Don’t get me wrong…I don’t hate healthy people. I know some and they’re lovely people ,mostly. There are some who are positively tedious though… walking around with their relentlessly healthy faces flashing like pink neon into the creased and cross faces of the rest of us. My wife woke up in pain this morning, so did I…and while we’re thankful to have made it out of bed at all…I admit to harbouring a little resentment when I see the young folks bounding down the steps across the street like living Viagra commercials…with earphone heads and full race flip flops. I was once one of them…even more fiercely so…bullet proof. Alas…that’s a lie. I was dragged into the world screaming and I’ve maintained an ongoing relationship with “health-care-professionals.” ever since.
Among my pals, the idea of “healthy” is a relative term…flexible…changeable. It often depends upon the weather…or the phases of the moon…or what’s currently on T.V.. A lot of my pals discovered the word “fitness” waiting on their doorsteps like an abandoned newspaper intended for some one else. It was late in their lives but they took up the notion, bought bicycles, joined gyms, learned to speak yoga and stretching, laced up high tech shoes and galloped into the streets, tearing muscles, pulling tendons, breaking collar bones, collecting stitches, sprains, ligament ruptures, blisters, bruises and road rash. They stopped smoking and reduced the alcohol intake, woke up in pain nearly every day . But the data didn’t lie…They were, we were, getting healthier every day. Some were convinced that they had shaved years off their bodies and faces…Started looking less myopically at younger women or younger men….began to wonder if that Viagra stuff really works….Oh hell yes!!
And while we’re on the topic I’ll just divert into a long standing annoyance. Spandex ought to come with age warnings (in large print) and while they’re at it there also need to be safety warnings about weight loads on spandex like they have on elevators, for example…”This garment will not hold more than three hundred pounds” and for old dudes in speedos…the warning should be a two foot by three foot sign they need to carry…at all times.
Healthy, is a state of mind and it pisses me off that young people take it for granted…even though I understand their reluctance to think about it. There used to be societies and yes I know there are still societies where young people maintained a caring and helping relationship with elders whose health has become less rosy and more thorny. Good on them. Forty years ago I was doing research on chronic wards in provincial mental health hospitals. Desperate and devastating places to live out your dementia or Alzheimers. The problem? Apartment buildings…The young family on the rise, working in the city, two bedroom apartment…in a high rise…no room for demented daddy or doddering mom. Not enough cash for a private nursing home…What to do? Well, with some helpful doctors, the old folks can be certified…What’s that? It means that they aren’t capable of managing their affairs…might be a danger to themselves (How long has that pot been on the stove, mom?) or to others. Oh the guilt…no matter how deluded they were the young family knows that the old folks are not enjoying their golden years in a fucking spa.
And so, as we edge into the twilight of our years, a few of us older citizens are struggling to stay as healthy as possible and we’re growing increasingly mistrustful of the relatively healthy forty year olds. We see the way they look at us. We want to be healthy enough to fight them off when they decide to “put us away”.
Just to be on the safe side I’m checking out mixed martial arts …sending away for their large decals…getting a bumper sticker that says “Fists of Steel…slightly rusty”
But don’t get me wrong…I don’t hate healthy people. I just think they may be dangerous to those of us who aren’t…and until it’s all redefined…we need to be vigilant.
Blues 11-06-13
Chagal4's Blog 